okay, i've just finished the post on my other blog about my day yesterday. and i'm having a lot of fear. i haven't owned this much of my own story and personal writing "in public" and under my own name before and it's freaking me out.
i know that this is a huge part of why i'm stalled lately. my fear of rejection and judgment is massive.
yesterday was so personal. so important. it would have been so natural to write about it here where i am safe. with all of you. the people who get it. the people who know me without knowing me. but there. there anyone could read it. there people from my past lives can access it. it's fed into my facebook profile. what have i done?
tears are streaming down my face. the temptation to delete it and repost it here is huge.
it's not like i've taken my clothes off and pranced around for all to see, but it really feels like i've left part of me there for people who "know/know" me to see. and judge. and reject. and talk about amongst themselves. leaving me out. and judging me. and saying mean things. and dang. why is this so hard?
why is being me so much easier to do when no one is looking?