Thursday, December 08, 2005

venti venting

don't mind me, i'm in need of a good vent... one of my 'best' friends here has a bad habit. i try with all of my might not to hold it against her. she's still on the un-merry-go-round of busy. but it hurts and i need to get it out, and here is safe, so if you don't mind this is just for me...

i hate time limit friendships.

'i have 20 minutes, can i stop by?' 'i have to go do this, but i thought i'd give you a call...' it's her way of protecting herself.

she thinks it's healthy boundaries, but what it does is say 'hey, i have this list here, and this list is the most important thing, and right here, on this list is your name, with a ticky box next to it, and i want to check it off so i can convince myself i have no guilt to bear. so i'm calling/stopping by to see you for my 20 minutes before i go and do the real stuff that's really important that i don't want your guilt to tie me up into, so hi, can i have a hug, gosh i miss you, goodbye...'

i was having a really productive, good day and now i feel like a tornado just blew through... so don't mind me, i just wanted to be able to stop spinning about it and get it out... i'm feeling better now... goodbye.

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