oh how i love recovery people. 12-steppers speak my language and i hadn't realize how very much i missed it.
we've had 3 weeks of meetings now and i am loving what is happening here, and within me. it feels so good to be back in active recovery. there is a shorthand that happens at meetings for those of you who aren't addicts, one word or small phrase in someone's story touches the group and we all smile together, each knowing that it is the same in our own lives. it's just something universal, a deep written code, like XML for the addict, you can't see it, but when 2 or more are gathered together... the language is effortless. stories flow and bonding is immediate. a newcomer feels like a long lost friend. it's really a beautiful thing.
i find that being back in recovery has helped me to speak my truth more confidently too. i just got off the phone with a good friend here who's daughter is struggling mightily with an anorexia. months ago i was timid and unconfident in my words to her. today on the phone we spoke for over an hour and as she asked questions i was able to tell my story and share my experience, strength and hope in a way that i had been unable to previously. she noticed. she heard and god willing it will make some difference in the life of this young girl and her family.
so today i rejoice in "hanging with my peeps" and having a fledgling community of people who speak my language face to face.
5 comments:
I am thrilled for you!
It must feel amazing to be walking into the life you were meant to live... a life of freedom and creating spaces for healing. Wow :)
I was surprised by how soon I felt comfortable in my 12 step group. I ramble on and no one cares and they always thank me when I'm done. It's nice.
You know, I understand exactly what you mean about 'the language'. I've felt for years I've been talking a different language, trying to explain myself to dr.s, counselors, people in general. It's been nothing less an revolution in understanding to find that other people actually struggle with and talk about the same things I do.
It's really something to being able to say, "boep#00!!!' and have someone know exactly what I mean!
I know what you mean too - but more as an outsider who's friends speak the language. I love it. I am only an outsider because the groups I have gone to have made their own principals based on the 12-Steps, and you know what - its just not the same. Its not as real. I am just realizing that. But the thing they do have in common is sharing their experience, strength and hope.
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