i am angry. of all the people in god's green earth i thought liam got it. i thought he really understood how diabolical predators truly are. he has seen first hand the damage done in my life because at least two males had their way with me.
we have a 14 year old predator at church. he's a bastard, i could tear him limb from limb. he's got the full brunt of my wrath right now (of course i have not even acknowledged that i know or said anything to anyone but liam) but liam has just gotten an earful.
tonight is an all-nighter at a fun park. the area churches have rented it for the night and are going to be there for a lock-in. this boy has been cornering all of the mid-high girls and propositioning them, stalking them and even a couple he's tried to touch while he cornered them. and these are the ones we know about. it is all i can do to let liam handle this. but i have.
he has done well up to this point. tonight i found out that he is allowing this little creep to attend the lock-in. we had discussed this earlier and i was shocked to receive a phone call from the boy asking questions about the night. i truly thought he was trying to manipulate his way in. little did i know liam had given him permission at attend.
i am angry. if he can't be trusted in the confines of our own church how can he be trusted with 400 pre-teens/teens at an all night function? i just gave liam both barrels. that could be our daughter. i am livid. i'm hoping that writing this out will help clear away the white hot rage and flashes of light that are flying in my head right now. i have never been in touch with this level of controlled rage before. i know the level of hatred i am feeling toward this boy is misdirected, but i truly don't care.
people who could do something to stop someone from being hurt and still choose not to set limits is completely unfathomable to me. there were too many people who could have stopped what happened to me. what happens to everyone who is abused. i just can't stomach the thought that something could happen tonight that ruins a little girl's life. why can't liam understand this?
UPDATE: liam and staff maintained a close watch on the kid, he was always within 5 feet of an adult, i just can't stand the thought of anyone every going through the yuck that i've been through. and i'm going to apologize for burning liam's ears off with my blistering attack last night... oh was i angry...