Wednesday, May 24, 2006

chasing paper, getting nowhere

liam and i have found ourselves in a spot that neither of us are ready for. it has been an emotional slog through each other's pain, burn-out and emotional upheaval. our commitment to each other hasn't budged, but finding the page we lost somewhere back to each other has been strained and struggling.

the move, the finances, the job search and job find were all ways that brought us together and took us apart. we have both been wounded and wounding these past couple of weeks. the stress of it all was becoming evident in our kids. we tried to only deal with it when school was in, or not at all, but they have radar installed for these things. most of the time it wasn't overt, but even that cold chill of disconnection creeps into the bones.

today we made progress. i have written before about the fact that we're just trying to hold it together until the landlords arrive (one is a counselor specializing in pastoral burnout and gender issues - we couldn't be more ready to see her if we tried). it's just that there is so much living to do between now and then. and adam sandler's life "clicker" isn't available to fast-forward us there. today there was real live communication - a couple of ah-ha moments and a restatement of our commitment to our marriage and to each other. we're on our way back home.

for liam - i love you.

The Two of Us - Lennon & McCartney

Two of us riding nowhere
spending someone's hard earned pay
You and me Sunday driving
Not arriving on our way back home
We're on our way back home
We're on our way home
We're going home

Two of us sending postcards
writing letters on my wall
You and me burning matches
lifting latches on our way back home
We're on our way back home
We're on our way home
We're going home

You and I have memories
longer that that road
that stretches out ahead

Two of us wearing raincoats
standing solo in the sun
You and me chasing paper
getting nowhere on our way back home
We're on our way back home
We're on our way home
We're going home

You and I have memories
longer that that road
that stretches out ahead

Two of us wearing raincoats
standing solo in the sun
You and me chasing paper
getting nowhere on our way back home
We're on our way back home
We're on our way home
We're going home
We're going home

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